The Mental Health thread

[Parkins left foot]

This thread is eye opening. And I feel safe to open up.

Following the strokes my good lady suffered a few years back, (when the wonderful members of this forum rallied round us, something I will always be grateful for), in the last few weeks Christine has been in and out hospital as her health has deteriorated. She has been diagnosed with vascular dementia, which we have been told has been caused mainly by the stroke and the disruption in the supply of blood to the brain. We have also been told the the illness could compromise her life expectancy. How this wonderful lady has coped with it all is beyond me.

I feel so desperately sad to see my best friend in such ill health, and would do anything to make her better.

Sorry for the rant, but this thread has allowed me to express feelings I have struggled to keep to myself.

Sorry to hear this Frank - is there any treatment that can be given to help?

 

[Boozad]

My mom’s been Bipolar for the last twenty years or so, it’s vile seeing what it has done to her. Spending loads of time on psychiatric wards at both New Cross and Penn changed me forever.

Had a bout of depression back when I was 23 after losing my grandad, unborn kid, missus and flat within the space of a few months. Can’t remember how long it lasted but it wasn’t good.

 

[Deleted Cyber]

This thread is eye opening. And I feel safe to open up.

Following the strokes my good lady suffered a few years back, (when the wonderful members of this forum rallied round us, something I will always be grateful for), in the last few weeks Christine has been in and out hospital as her health has deteriorated. She has been diagnosed with vascular dementia, which we have been told has been caused mainly by the stroke and the disruption in the supply of blood to the brain. We have also been told the the illness could compromise her life expectancy. How this wonderful lady has coped with it all is beyond me.

I feel so desperately sad to see my best friend in such ill health, and would do anything to make her better.

Sorry for the rant, but this thread has allowed me to express feelings I have struggled to keep to myself.

No need to apologise in my view. I feel humble that you feel comfortable to say this to us. I hope its cathartic for you mate.

 

[Deleted Cyber]

Please do not take this as in any way disparaging. We are a right fucking bunch though aren't we?

 

[Paul]

Please do not take this as in any way disparaging. We are a right fucking bunch though aren't we?

You haven't even started to scratch the surface mate

 

[Alan]

I've been clinically depressed since I was about 14 (so going on 12 years now).

It's pretty well under control now, but with my medications it's like pouring $200 down the drain every month.

I'm curious how seriously the NHS takes mental health. Thoughts?

 

[Kenny]

You haven't even started to scratch the surface mate

Indeed. Mulling over whether or not to share my shizzle. It will take me a while to type it up.

 

[Johnny75]

I've been clinically depressed since I was about 14 (so going on 12 years now).

It's pretty well under control now, but with my medications it's like pouring $200 down the drain every month.

I'm curious how seriously the NHS takes mental health. Thoughts?

The NHS take it very seriously, government not so although they are starting to realise that mental health costs business money.

 

[Boozad]

The NHS take it very seriously, government not so although they are starting to realise that mental health costs business money.

Not from my experience they don’t. Or didn’t anyway, it’s been a few years since my mom’s been in hospital.

 

[Paul]

Indeed. Mulling over whether or not to share my shizzle. It will take me a while to type it up.

Indeed, I don't want any of you thinking any less of me

 

[jd1981]

So glad someone has started a thread like this, I suffer from regular bouts of depression and severe anxiety one of the main reasons I had to leave the police.
I've been on anti-depressants for a prolonged period now and will be for a long time.
I've had CBT before which didn't really work for me.

To answer Alan question people working within the NHS take Mentsl Health very seriously, doesn't help recent government cuts to MH services.
Trying to get a GP appointment can also be problematic up to two weeks sometimes and when you get in you literally have 10 minutes.
I found working in the Police they took my MH issue really seriously and were a great support to me as you'd expect.

 

[MARKakaJIM]

Never had any mental health issues myself, but my dad did have an 'episode' last year, honestly no idea what the proper terminology is!

Think until then it was something I'd always been a bit ignorant of, not really seeing the true extent of things first hand can make it difficult to really understand things sometimes. The change in him was incredibly stark though and really opened my eyes to how it can affect people.

For as long as I can remember my dad had always seemed pretty comfortable with himself, not like one of these people who was always the life and soul of the party but he was sociable with pretty much anyone and just as happy with his own company. Probably a bit of a pessimist and for some reason oddly paranoid about things being locked but otherwise nothing out of the ordinary, just a pretty normal guy with wife, kids, house and a decent job.

Think he was first diagnosed with anxiety, he became really uncomfortable around people especially large groups, and was prescribed some medication. That had the side effect of messing with his sleep and think after a few more trips to the doctors he was diagnosed with some level of depression too, he ended up being signed off from work at that point and was just confined to the house spiraling deeper and deeper. He didn't seem to get any benefit from medication, just side effects like the lack of sleep that made things worse for him. Yet despite that he couldn't get any alternative treatments through the NHS, after a while my nan ended up paying for him to go see someone private and that seemed to get him back on the right track.

Thankfully it was a relatively short lived ordeal for him and seems to be his old self again now, no longer on any medication either as far as I'm aware. Few things really stood out for me in that time though, namely the speed/scale of the change in him and how badly my mom seemed to deal with him whilst he was suffering.

The only thing I can remember happening around the time it started was that he tore a muscle in his calf. We hadn't long returned from my sister's wedding in Cyprus where he'd been playing quite a bit of squash, tennis and swimming with us lot who were all under half his age. He carried on going to play squash with my brother in law afterwards and that's where he had his injury. Obviously I'm no expert in this subject but I've always thought that it might have been the trigger, a sort of realisation he was getting old and becoming more vulnerable, think that then worried him about doing other things he'd never have been concerned about before.

When he first opened up about his troubles to me I found it quite uncomfortable, I'm a bit dead inside and never really been one for any sort of emotional displays. As I was still at my parents at the time, I'd frequently be joined by him at breakfast time and although it was far from the start to the day I wanted before driving over an hour to work, it seemed like he needed to get things off his chest so I always made the time for him. Not sure he got the same patience from my mom very often though, there were several occasions I can remember where I'd overhear her going off on one at him, think once he even questioned if I'd heard them arguing when we had our breakfast chat but I pleaded ignorance. It was clear to me that he wasn't really my dad at that point, not the man I'd grown up knowing anyway, so I had to extend a degree of leeway for this new personality as difficult as it could be sometimes. My mom just seemed to get increasingly frustrated with him through, like this new personality was a choice he was making and he should just snap out of it to avoid the problems it was causing.

 

[Paddingtonwolf]

I have just sat here and realised where mine started.

I was a happy (if spectacularly arrogant) person until 1991. By then I was drinking like a fish, gambling like it was going out of fashion and trying (and failing) to get my leg over every night. And then my childhood friend died. He was a scholar at Manchester United and was the year above Beckham and Co. They sent him to Burnley on loan at 16. He was at training and the ball went onto a stand roof. In his usual I am immortal style he vaulted up to get it. The tar felt on that old stand didn't take his weight and he fell through and landed on a crush barrier. Killed instantly.

The funeral was horrific. All of the Manchester United first team of that time were there (three line whip from SAF himself, who was present with Bobby Charlton and Martin Edwards), Paul Power who was a family friend, represented Manchester City. There were loads of other football people there. I was so numb, I never really noticed them all, bar I remember Bobby Charlton being very kind and checking everyone was okay. Such a lovely man.

I think that week is where my depression came from. I flunked the second year of University completely as I don't think I was sober for even 10 minutes in six months. And since then things like relationship breakups, not being able to see my children, the hate-hate relationship with their mother, lack of success, lack of work at times, losing a house, the deaths of my parents, all of them re-awoke the black dog that first appeared by my side at that particular funeral

 

[Parkins left foot]

Reading this thread shows me how lucky I have been with my MH over a fairly longish life (at least compared to most on here)

Think I must be slightly autistic as not much tends to affect me dramatically though probably only on the edge of that spectrum as very able to mask it

 

[jd1981]

Reading this thread shows me how lucky I have been with my MH over a fairly longish life (at least compared to most on here)

Think I must be slightly autistic as not much tends to affect me dramatically though probably only on the edge of that spectrum as very able to mask it

I'm the complete opposite I turn the slightest bit of bad news into a catastrophe, in the space of ten minutes my mind will race from me living in my nice semi rural house to living in B&B with the kids because I've screwed everything up.
Can't remember a time when this started but it's definitely got worse since having kids. Not because I don't like having them but because I'm so worried about letting them down.

 

[Parkins left foot]

I'm the complete opposite I turn the slightest bit of bad news into a catastrophe, in the space of ten minutes my mind will race from me living in my nice semi rural house to living in B&B with the kids because I've screwed everything up.
Can't remember a time when this started but it's definitely got worse since having kids. Not because I don't like having them but because I'm so worried about letting them down.

Reinforces my view of myself - when something bad occurs will think about what I can do practically rather than fussing about the consequences or emotions - probably makes me look as as if I don't fully understand how others are feeling always. Even when my children were little & suffered traumatic events which needed immediate hospitalisation tended to go into practical mode to deal with the issue at that time.

Has taken me a good number of years to fully understand myself & not sure that I am completely there yet

 

[Penk Wolf]

The missus has anxiety, which I struggle with. I've not had any MH problems yet and hopefully stays that way. pressures of work are starting to get to me, which is starting to give me an idea of what depression could be like.

 

[Deleted Cyber]

Girlfriend at 16 whose mother died at 17 father killed at18 4 year old sister to look after so married me at 19 kids at 21 and 23, divorced at 27. I knew no better so remarried the first girl who wanted 2 kids and to settle Down. So child 3 at 30 child 4 at 32 divorced at 35 and a single parent. Kids back to mum at 38 as she was pregnant by new boyfriend but by this time I had melted down and built myself back up so got on with living, working and building my life back. New wife at 41, she proposed to me on Feb 29 the and still together. She was born deaf so cant hear my rantings! Crammed a lot in lol!

 

[Jabbawolf]

Reading this thread shows me how lucky I have been with my MH over a fairly longish life (at least compared to most on here)

Think I must be slightly autistic as not much tends to affect me dramatically though probably only on the edge of that spectrum as very able to mask it

Autism is likely to make you more anxious, and prone to MH issues, than less.

 

[SLA]

The missus has anxiety, which I struggle with. I've not had any MH problems yet and hopefully stays that way. pressures of work are starting to get to me, which is starting to give me an idea of what depression could be like.

Anxiety plays the major part for my wife now. Pretty much anything can send her into a panic, which then can lead to a few depressive days in bed. Nothing planned for tea tonight - PANIC! Can't find the top to go with these jeans - PANIC! It really can be minor stuff like that which gets blown up in mind and leads to bigger problems. No doubt it's hard for her, but it's also very hard to be around. (shall we have a no fnarr's rule for this thread - there's going to be a lot of hard things!)