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Worst player ever

Deutsch Wolf

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Tough competition (been talking through this with my Dad).

We've gone through your Noubles, your outfield Paul Joneseses, your Lipstick Darrens.

Here's your winner.

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Mike Small.

Hands down the worst footballer I have ever seen. Beyond awful.

Beat that.

Bonus Gary Bellamy mullet in that picture too.
 
A trip to the mid 80s is always a good place for these kind of threads. I didn't see Cavan Chapman play who frequently gets mentioned, so can't pick him. I did however see Ray Hankin, the only player I know we've sacked for being overweight.
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Laurie Madden, genuinely awful. Looked like he was literally carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders.
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Honourable mention to Darren Simkin.
 
One of those chants that everyone ripped off from Forest and Des Walker. He was our centre half so got the song, be it factually inaccurate
 
Rohan Ricketts with a mention for Olofinjana in despatches. Some people didn't like Eric Young but I thought he was the dogs.
 
Other players mentioned above were shit, but Rohan Ricketts was a fucking coward to go with it. Awful.
 
Robert Niestroij, spelling probably from the late 90’s.
 
He played barely any minutes for us. He spent more time in Penn Tandoori than he did on the pitch. There are many worse examples you could give.

(Although he was shit)
 
He played barely any minutes for us. He spent more time in Penn Tandoori than he did on the pitch. There are many worse examples you could give.

(Although he was shit)

Maierhoffer the 6ft 7 man who gets smaller when he jumps
 
Maierhoffer the 6ft 7 man who gets smaller when he jumps

Really wasn't trusted enough to get on the pitch to be counted - you might as well put Grant Holt up who spent longer (very slowly) running down the side of the pitch warming up than he ever did for the little he was on it.

Not sure that you can include them as they didn't really play, just appeared on the pitch for a few minutes.
 
As Frank isn't here any more. I'll say Alan Boswell for old times sake
 
Ray Hankin by a mile.
Real low point.

Watching him run towards the southbank was scary. You could feel the ground rumbling he was that fat
 
Manuel Thetis. Kaspars Gorkss. Paul Blades. Joakim Bjorklund. Simon Coleman. Roger Johnson.

We've really had some terrible centre-halves.
 
There’s loads of players who have been awful for various reasons. Plenty of them barely played (Gladon), some of them have been way below the level (Maierhoffer), awful attitude (Halford), but I’m struggling to think of someone worse than Jake Cassidy. I wouldn’t pick him on my 5 a side team.

Strikers normally have an area of strength, whether that be pace, poacher, build up, strength and aerial ability etc. But he was honestly useless at everything. Even as an enthusiastic kid you’d hope work rate Would help you out. Utter garbage
 
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