The Film Thread

[Wombat del combate]

The thing with the original Green Street is that it's so eyewateringly bad it's good, a bit like having the biggest, filthiest, oozing-with-saturated fat, carbohydrate-and-debatably-sourced-meat takeaway extravaganza from that place which got shut down because of rat shit in the kitchen and garners nothing but disapproving looks from all around you but is the best thing ever for those few blissful moments, after which point you feel complete and utter shame for having indulged so wantonly and avow never to repeat the experience. Until the next time.

 

[Boozad]

Happy to channel my inner Barry Norman on this occasion:

Green Street 2

Occasionally, you watch a film which is so horrendously bad that you have to keep watching it because it's either amusing or to tell people 'I watched this and it was sooooo bad'. But sometimes, a really really bad film transcends that and is just borderline offensive.

Green Street 2 makes no sense. At all. There may be some form of plot in there but TBH if there was, I missed it and I don't think it's because it was too subtle. Plenty of 'facks' and 'cants' and 'slags getting cut' during fights in prison cells (honestly - shocking security in a prison....) and - spoiler: there's a football match involved and some of the players resort to fouling each other. To summarise: a guy we barely saw in GS1 is in prison with lots of other guys we definitely never saw from GS1. They support West Ham, so inevitably, the prison authorities put them in a block with lots of Millwall fans (they're the baddies) none of whom we ever saw in GS1 either, not even the big bloke who played Ackerman in Red Dwarf VIII. The guards/warden of this prison DEFINITELY didn't see GS1 because if you put West Ham 'lads' anywhere near Millwall 'lads', they tend to like bashing seven shades of shit out of each other. Anyway, they don't get on, and no surprises here - they fight a lot. Oh yeah, and there are some shady Russian hooligans in there as well because - y'know - why not? They're good at hooligans.

The entertainment industry is full of weird links - one of these is that an actor (Ross McCall) from the incredible Band of Brothers - my favourite drama of all time and choc-a-block full of amazing performances - is the lead role in this turd of a movie.

The only positive I can say about Green Street 2 is that it makes the original Green Street look half decent and full of Oscar-worthy performances. (Narrator: the original Green Street is NOT half decent and does NOT feature Oscar winning performances. Elijah Wood sadly does not make a credible football hooligan and Charlie Hunnam cannot do a cockney accent...) But sadly, that positive note is lost when I would have rather spent the 90 minutes suffering this shit waist deep in raw sewage.

It truly is one of the very worst films I have ever seen.

0/5

Never seen Green Street but I'm going to watch them both now just to piss myself off. Can't stand Charlie Hunnam either but I'll put up with him for this.

 

[Boozad]

Is that Harry Maguire on the left?

 

[Boozad]

Ooh there's a Green Street 3 as well. Joy of joys.

 

[Jabbawolf]

Watched a film on Amazon yesterday called Green Book - lovely film, based on a true story, about a friendship between an Italian doorman who ends up working for a black musician - humorous, well-paced and thoughtful - thoroughly recommend.

 

[The Bear]

I watched that a few weeks ago. Very decent, though not quite Best Picture material tbh.

 

[Boozad]

Watched the 1989 Batman with the girls earlier and while it really hasn't aged that well it's still a pretty decent film. Nicholson's performance is still superb and it's the first time I've noticed that Keaton's is just as good. The suit didn't really help him, that's become blatantly obvious over the years!

 

[Pablowolf]

The Tax Collector - The trailer looked really decent, but boy oh boy was the film a poo sandwich. Just don't bother. Mind, watch the trailer to look at Shia Labeouf's ears, which I assume were prosthetic.

 

[Tredman]

Knives out. Totally not what I expected, excellent film.

 

[Langers]

Joker.

Amazing. Loved every second of it - Joaquin Phoenix is just sensational. A thoroughly deserved Oscar.

 

[BillyDee]

Knives out. Totally not what I expected, excellent film.

It really is.

 

[Boozad]

Joker.

Amazing. Loved every second of it - Joaquin Phoenix is just sensational. A thoroughly deserved Oscar.

Brilliant isn’t it?

 

[PPB]

The Invisible Man.

Don't bother with this one.

 

[BillyDee]

The Invisible Man.

Don't bother with this one.

I didn't see it...
:icon_razz:

 

[Paul]

I didn't see it...
:icon_razz:

Really ???

 

[Boozad]

The Invisible Man is awful.

Anybody seen Apostle on Netflix?

 

[Newbridge Wolf]

ID on Amazon prime, ok so looking back it hasn't aged that well, but so many memorable lines, and at the base of it not too bad a story, just wished I'd not started watching it so late.

I farkin lav u Gambo!

 

[Pablowolf]

Saw Spree last night, which I enjoyed. It's starring the guy who plays Steve in Stranger Things.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zA1vTNMWMe4

 

[Paul]

You do realise if you've never seen Stranger Things the enjoyment of your comment ends after you learn that you watched Spree last night ?

 

[Pablowolf]

All you need know is that Steve is a god damned hero with fantastic hair.